Jenny Craig Portion Nazi

Related Comic: The Jenny Craig Twist

The Diet:

Eat all meals as pre-packaged by Jenny Craig. Some meals may be supplemented with vegetables and fruits.

The Experience:

A lot can be said about Jenny Craig's portion sizes and it would be easy to poke fun at them, so I am going to do just that.

If you are accustomed to a sizeable amount of food, such as the amount it would take to actually keep a human alive, you will find the Jenny Craig meals to be a little small. The website says "not only does Jenny's Cuisine® give you a convenient model of portion size, it may also be a tool to help you feel satisfied in a healthy way."

May...help you feel satisfied

"May also be a tool to help you feel satisfied" is like saying "may also lead to spontaneously acquiring super powers." It has never actually happened, but it may happen. The portions are so small that even immediately after eating a meal, you will still be wondering where your money went.

Convenient Model Of Portion Size

It must feel extremely convenient for them to sell you a paltry amount of food for an outrageous amount. I purchased 2 3-day sample packs, these each cost $40, so a total of $80 for 6 days. On the normal program you will spend $100 a week on food (for 7 days), with a $400 "deposit." This deposit is to make sure you feel trapped in this heniously expensive diet plan. I estimate you could get aproximately 10 times more food with your $100 if you bought things from a grocery store. Even if you want the frozen meals, they are often on sale for $1-2, which means you can buy anywhere between 50-100 of them for the same price, and receive substantially more food than you did from Jenny Craig.

Originally I thought the Jenny Craig meals were designed to be standalone, meaning you would only eat their food items. Partway through the week while I was starving I did a little more research and discovered you are actually supposed to supplement the meals with either a small portion of fruit or a side salad. This means on top of your overpriced food, you should be spending even more to make sure you have to strength to keep making credit card payments.

I should say that the food is actually pretty good. Everything cooks easily in the microwave and actually tastes great. Just be sure to take the time to savor those tiny morsels of food, because they will be few and far between.

Friday and Saturday were the worst two days for me, I felt the hungriest the most on those days and even when I started eating salad I felt ill for both days.

The Result:

At one point I was 5 pounds down from the previous Sunday, which didn't sound very healthy to me. Saturday night I had some milk and cookies, and when I weighed in on Sunday I was 3 pounds down from a week ago. 3 pounds is okay, 5 pounds sounds like I was in a concentration camp.

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